5HT #126: how to sell your health brand to L Catterton, chicken purses, and 3 more

Earlier this month, a German fitness race that started with a few hundred people, a sled, and some wall balls was acquired by a consortium led by L Catterton. They bought a majority stake in HYROX, and Bloomberg pegged the valuation around €600M. 

What is an “L Catterton” and what are they doing and why does it matter?

Well, they’re a PE firm that’s currently one of the most active buyers in consumer health. And they’re worth you knowing! Backed by the LVMH and Arnault family, they manage $40B+ across 18 offices and write check sizes from $5M to $5B (yes, a very big range). Over the years, they’ve invested in brands like Birkenstock, Peloton, Equinox, Honest Company, Cholula, Plum Organics, CorePower Yoga, Solidcore, ClassPass, and Thorne. 

Fun fact: I’ve even pitched them a few times—once with Greatist and a couple times with Ness. Neither turned into a deal, but hey, you can learn a lot about what a firm wants from the questions they ask even if they’re not buying

So what are they looking for? Here’s my thesis for what their investments have in common—and what needs to be true for them to consider investing/buying your brand:

1️⃣ Become a cultural phenomenon.

The goal should be building a brand that journalists, doctors, and members or customers are talking about unprompted.

Thorne is the perfect example of this. In August, L Catterton sold Thorne to P&G for $3.8B in cash 💰, a business they had originally taken private in 2023 for about $680M. P&G didn’t pay $3.8B for a Somerville manufacturing facility. They paid it because when someone you trust recommends a supplement brand, it’s often Thorne. 

Look elsewhere on the roster, too. Birkenstock turned a pharmacy sandal into a status symbol. Honest Company became a name every mother knows. Solidcore has a cult following and spearheaded a category that was ClassPass' most-booked workout in 2025.

But you cannot spreadsheet your way into cultural gravity. The brands that get bought have earned media, organic communities, people posting unprompted, looks you’d recognize across the gym floor.

 2️⃣ Name a new category, don’t just compete in an existing one.

It’s not enough to be a business in the space… you have to define it. For example, HYROX isn’t a race; it’s now a noun. People are saying, “I’m doing a HYROX,” the way they say, “I’m doing a marathon.” 

Another good example of this is ClassPass. No one was doing what they were. They basically invented a new way to book fitness classes.

3️⃣ Build a repeat mechanic before you scale.

L Catterton isn’t buying or investing in businesses where your revenue doesn’t show up again next month without you having to opt in again.

HYROX, for example, has 15,000 affiliated training clubs paying affiliation fees for programming and branding. The dollars there are small, but the structure is the asset. HYROX is also a thing people want to watch, opening up opportunities for sponsorships, streaming, and spectators. All that is stuff that renews, not a one-time thing. Heck, they just announced a partnership with Amazon because they’ve built this huge reach. 

Same with Thorne, which are supplements that sell like subscriptions. Even Birkenstock, who said that the average customer owns 3.6 pairs of its shoes, and there’s a whole Reddit thread about how often people buy new Birks. 

4️⃣ Be profitable and make money. 

L Catterton also doesn’t invest in businesses that aren’t already working. That’s a key part of why they’re not a venture investor, but a PE firm.

MARS Men, which they led the Series A in, claimed a $100M run rate in under 18 months and was supposedly profitable before they raised money from L Catterton. Basically they’re buying the proof and then accelerating it.

Putting everything together, the killer combo is a brand people talk about and a business that keeps bringing them back. 🔄

Of course, you don’t really sell a brand like that to L Catterton. L Catterton comes looking. They said they’d admired Thorne for years ahead of buying it. I think that looked like years of researching vitamins and supplements, then choosing the brand they thought was best positioned. They map out a category and call whoever’s number one. 🤙

Ultimately, the strategy isn’t a pitch—it’s becoming unmissable.

Looking back at Greatist and Ness, neither was there yet. I think Ness could have been, but we didn’t get there in time. (And now, with Fixie Dust (coming soon!), we get to create our own category… but will the product be so darn good that people bring it up in line at Erewhon, share on Slack, and write about in their newsletters?! That’s going to be the work!

Apparently, bags made of chicken are trending. 

First it was Walmart with their rotisserie chicken purse. 

Now, Burger King released “Le Nugguette.”

It’s a limited-edition micro-bag that holds exactly one 👆 chicken nugget. It even comes with sauce-inspired charms, including Honey Mustard and Sweet & Sour. 🤣

Sharing in case, ya know, this inspires your next chicken-related item.

My fave Eric Topol recently pushed back on HRV and Readiness Scores shortly after Apple rolled out its Readiness score of 0 to 10 after revamping its Apple Watch Health Sensing System. 

To Topol, we’re “not ready” for Readiness Scores. He argues these scores lack real-world proof and does seem he’s (as usual) right. As of now, there’s no actual evidence that Readiness Scores meaningfully relate to health outcomes 🤷. (He had a similar argument for V02 Max, which I wrote about here.) 

I largely agree with Topol. If your product gives someone a number and—here’s the kicker 🦵—offers suggestions based on that number, you should be able to prove that following that advice actually helps. IMO, there’s a real opportunity for whoever can prove their score means something and leads people to achieve better health outcomes.

Also, quick rant: why does every wearable brand need its own scoring system 🙄? I’d loveeee a common standard, so we’re not translating between Apple vs. WHOOP vs. Oura.

Since launching Healthyish Content, we've grown to 20ish clients and a team of 40+ entirely through referrals and word of mouth. But this whole time it was just me and my COO running the show day in, day out. The growth we’ve had is awesome, but it’s also been a loooot.

So, earlier this year, we hired a General Manager to run the day-to-day operations. (Hi, Nina 👋!)

Even though our time was thin, I wasn’t actually recruiting a GM (though maybe I should’ve been). What really happened was that I caught up with Nina, a long-time college friend and editorial leader, and we ended up talking about what she wants next in her career. As we were talking, it occurred to me—Healthyish Content could be that thing.

Nina actually had been influencing Healthyish Content from day one–in fact, she referred our Head of Editorial, the amazing Amelia Edelman, to us right as we were getting started! 

Though I maybe stumbled into hiring a GM 😂, the benefit was immediate. As soon as Nina joined, the freedom showed up fast. Like freaky fast. Though I'm still involved strategically, hands-on with the team, and go deep when needed—my weeks now increasingly go to the things I'm actually best at and the things only I can do:

➡️ Writing this newsletter (love you guys)
➡️ Advising and consulting with health companies like Radial & Phreesia
➡️ Aaand launching my first CPG product, Fixie Dust 🤸

The goal was always a business that doesn't need me in every room—and this was the biggest step yet toward that.

Oh—and if you also want to hire someone to run your day-to-day like me 🙃, feel free to share it, and I’ll include it in my weekly roundup of health marketing gigs I share every Monday.

I got the Eight Sleep 5 last year, and it’s definitely improved my sleep. (I wrote more about it here.) Yesterday, Eight Sleep announced the Pod 6: revised hardware, more biometric sensors, more sizes, and faster temperature response.

The added sensors can help distinguish signals from two people sleeping close together, or apparently separate a sleeper's signal from a pet or child on the bed. (Worth saying I’ve been fighting a mostly losing battle against our dog, King Arthur, sleeping with us—I’ll take any tips.)

The biggest hardware change is the Hub. Eight Sleep says it rebuilt the thing from scratch, made it small enough to fit under most bed frames, and sped up its response to night sweats and chills.

But here’s what really caught my attention about the Pod 6: the price. 

One of the things I said about the Pod 5 was that it was pretty expensive 😬, making it more of a nice-to-have vs. a must-have. But starting at $1,999 USD, the Pod 6 is actually way more accessible. I’d bet this price point opens Eight Sleep up to a whole new group of people. 

I’m alsoooo watching the company’s push toward medical device status. They’re currently pursuing FDA clearance for sleep apnea and running tons of clinical trials to prove efficacy. Will I think they get there? Tbd, but I like what I see. 

3 other healthyish things I’m into right now: 

Most clicked last week: Apparently a lot of you are wondering if you’re showering wrong. 🚿😆

👋 Who are you again? I’m Derek Flanzraich, and I’m in the business of healthyish. I founded two venture-backed startups–Greatist (👍) and Ness (👎)—and helped dozens of brands you know grow including Ro, GoodRx, Midi, BetterHelp, and LMNT. I now run Healthyish Content, plus a few other healthyish things (like Fixie Dust, launching this fall).

Every Thursday, I share what’s hot, what’s not, and what’s next in consumer health. (Disclosure: I invest in and advise companies in this space—when I cover one, I'll say so.) I sometimes add affiliate links, but they influence my picks zero.

See something smart, strange, or seriously overhyped? Hit reply, I respond to every email.